Wednesday, March 21, 2012

the state of things

i tried to cut on the light in ben’s room and the bulb flickered once before sputtering out completely.
that was the final straw. a lightbulb that refused to light.

it truly felt like someone had died. i collapsed against the wall and tried to keep my breathing even and i could literally feel the blood pulsing behind my eyes.

“don’t worry,” he said. “it’s just a lightbulb.”

“but everything is terrible.” i spoke the words directly against the wall. it was dark. maybe because the lightbulb had burnt out. maybe because my eyes were closed.

“look, i’ll change the bulb today while you’re at work. it’s not the end of the world.”

but honestly? it felt like it was the end of the world.

shit’s bleak.